


Helping Out

by stelleappese



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Elliot being a weirdo, Fluff and Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-11
Updated: 2015-07-11
Packaged: 2018-04-08 20:15:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4318461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stelleappese/pseuds/stelleappese
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Detective Elliot Stabler is personally outraged by the fact Doctor George Huang does not have a boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Helping Out

**Author's Note:**

> This is probably OOC as fuck, and it mainly came to life because I like BD Wong, cupcakes, and I'm a ridiculous human being :P

“You know, you’re very pretty”, says Elliot, in a matter-of-fact tone, right after a brief rant about the bakery that just opened around the corner, squinting at George as he goes through some suspect’s medical record.  
George looks up at him, a bit confused. “I’m sorry?”  
“Do you have a boyfriend?”  
George frowns. He opens his mouth to reply, then closes it, then says, again: “I’m sorry?”  
“I’m just saying, you’re an attractive guy, it would be weird if you didn’t”, shrugs Elliot.  
“I don’t… have a boyfriend”, mutters George, trying to go back to his work.  
“Why?”  
George shrugs, he reads the same sentence for the fourth time without understanding a thing. “I don’t really have time for interpersonal relationships.”  
“Weird”, comments Elliot, “I mean, if I were gay, I would…”  
“Please, don’t finish that sentence”, sighs George.  
“What I’m trying to say is that there’s absolutely no reason why some decent gay guy wouldn’t find you attractive”, Elliot says, then he turns and shouts: “Hey, Fin!”  
“What?”, answers Fin, both he and Munch looking at them.  
“Do you think Doctor Huang is pretty?”, asks Elliot. George slowly sinks behind the file he’s supposed to be examining.  
“Yeah, sure”, says Fin, “He’s got nice lips”, he says, then frowns at the look Munch is giving him, and murmurs an unconvinced: “What?”  
“See? Even straight guys think you’re attractive.”  
“That’s very flattering, and also very, _very_ , inappropriate…”, complains George.  
Elliot raises his hands up, “Whatever”, he says, “I still think people are missing out.”

*

George is chatting with Olivia near the coffee machine, he gives Elliot a little desperate look when he sees him approaching, and Elliot smiles brightly at him.  
“So”, he says, “Do you know Kevin from the lab?”  
“No?”, murmurs George, cautiously.  
“He’s a cool guy. Tall, blond, blue eyes…”  
Olivia looks at Elliot, then at George, then back at Elliot, and frowns.  
“Right”, sighs George.  
“He’s bisexual”, announces Elliot, cheerfully.  
“That’s nice”, murmurs George, rubbing his eyes.  
“What’s this about?”, asks Olivia, confused.  
“Detective Stabler thinks I need a boyfriend”, says George.  
“Oh”, says Olivia, then frowns a little, “You don’t have a boyfriend?”, she asks, surprised.  
“I know, right! It’s unacceptable”, says Elliot, excitedly.  
“I don’t _want_  a boyfriend. I’m completely fine!”, complains George, “If I wanted a boyfriend I would be _looking_  for one.”  
“Cool, then take a look at Kevin, can’t hurt to try”, shrugs Elliot.  
George rolls his eyes and walks away.

*

“What kind of guys do you think he likes?”, asks Elliot, as he and Olivia are sitting in the car on a stakeout; “I mean, smart, sure, he’s a smart guy, he would get bored otherwise, but…”, he shrugs, gives his donut a bite, chews for a moment, then goes: “Man, that new bakery _is_  the greatest thing to happen to this neighborhood in forever…”  
“Maybe someone more… gregarious?”, says Olivia, ignoring Elliot’s declaration of love for his donut, “I mean, George is pretty calm, maybe he needs someone who could, you know, lead him places, find things to do together…”  
“Yeah, yeah…”, agrees Elliot, “Do you think he has a type?”  
“I don’t know, I don’t think he’s ever dated anybody since he started working with us”, shrugs Olivia.  
“I swear to God, I thought Kevin would work fine…”  
“Maybe he isn’t into guys who look like surfers”, murmurs Olivia, grabbing the binoculars to take a look at something, “Maybe he likes, hm, Heathcliff kind of guys.”  
“Tall, dark, and handsome?”  
“Yeah, what’s not to like?”, murmurs Olivia, distractedly.  
“I’ll try that”, nods Elliot.  
“ _Or_ , you could let him decide whether he needs a boyfriend, and who he wants to date”, says Olivia.  
“Yeah, right”, snorts Elliot.

*

The bar is crowded enough, Elliot plops down on the chair next to Olivia’s and point at the counter, where George is waiting for his cocktail while a tall guy shamelessly hits on him.  
“See?”, he says, “I _told you_  he’s too pretty, no way people don’t notice that.”  
“Why are you getting so worked up about Doctor Huang’s love life?”, asks Fin, nursing his beer, “He’s a grown man, he can take care of himself.”  
“It just makes me feel bad, all right? I look at that tiny little jerk, and the thought that he’s not getting cuddles when he gets back home really fucks with my head.”  
Fin and Olivia exchange a look. “That makes absolutely no sense”, comments Olivia.  
“He has a point”, shrugs Fin, “It’s so sad…”  
“Well, it doesn’t really look like he wants cuddles from _that_  particular guy”, says Munch. The entire group turns to look at George.  
“Oh, damn”, sighs Elliot, “Why does he have to have a cute apologetic smile as a defense mechanism…”, he mutters, then gets up and marches towards the counter.  
He wraps an arm around George’s shoulders, gives him a squeeze, eyes stuck into the tall guy’s, “Is everything all right, honey?”, he asks. George whispers the tiniest ‘yes’ possible, looking like he wants to hug his glass, and blushing fiercely.  
The tall guy raises his hands in defeat and walks away.  
“Please, never call me ‘honey’ again”, mutters George.  
“Fair enough”, comments Elliot, still half-hugging George and sending death stares at the guy.  
“I can take care of myself”, complains George.  
“Did you see that guy? He’s a giant, and he looks sketchy, like hell I’m letting him bother you.”  
“Elliot”, sighs George, “It’s really nice that you’re… taking an interest in my life, but can you just _stop_  trying to help? _Please_?”  
“But…”  
“And could you let me go, please?”  
“Sure…”  
“Thank you”, whispers George, sneaking away as soon as Elliot’s grip on him loosens a little.

*

Elliot stops walking. It takes Olivia a moment to realize he’s not following, she turns to see him slowly walking backwards, then peeping inside George’s office.  
George is standing in front of his desk, on which a huge and colorful bouquet of flowers has been placed; he’s reading the little note tied to a red rose.  
“You got _flowers_?”, says Elliot, making George flinch.  
George just hums, looking like he’s not sure exactly what he has to do or say to make Elliot leave.  
“Who sent them?”, asks Elliot, marching inside George’s office.  
“I don’t know”, says George, “There’s no name.”  
“What does the note say?”  
“Elliot, leave him alone”, sighs Olivia.  
“It says: ‘thanks for the talk’”, murmurs George, with a little grin.  
“What does that mean? Does it mean you know this person? Is he nice?”  
“Elliot, let’s go”, insists Olivia, grabbing him and dragging him out, “Sorry”, she adds, looking at George, whose good mood seems to be distracting him from getting annoyed at Elliot.

*

“I want to sleep for a week”, groans Elliot, “I’ve gone through so much damn paperwork I still see letters dancing in front of my eyes…”  
Olivia pats Elliot’s back, she makes to say something, then stops. “Is that George?”, she says.  
Elliot follows her eyes.  
George is sitting at a table inside the new bakery, chatting with an Indian guy who keeps looking at him with something that looks a lot like awe.  
“Holy shit”, murmurs Elliot, “That’s the owner of the bakery. He’s flirting with the owner of the bakery.”  
“Can’t blame him”, shrugs Olivia, “Did you try his cupcakes?”  
“God, yes, they’re amazing…”, murmurs Elliot, “Would you look at those two? They’re _adorable_ …”  
“Don’t get ahead of yourself, maybe they’re just talking.”  
“I should do a background check on that guy, what if he’s a serial killer?”  
“Elliot”, says Olivia, “No.”  
“You’re right, that would be creepy. I’ll talk to him face to face.”  
Olivia’s glare is enough to make him shut up.  
“Fine…”, mutters Elliot, “He’ll tell me if he wants to tell me.”  
“Good. Now go get some sleep.”

*

“He’s a good man”, says George, halfway through their lunch.  
“Yeah?”, asks Elliot, trying not to look too eager to know.  
“His family is from Chennai. He spent a lot of time traveling around…”, he shrugs, pokes at his lunch, “He’s very cuddly”, he says, blushing a little.  
“That’s good”, says Elliot, “Are you, hm, are you sure he’s a decent person?”  
“He brings me breakfast in bed”, says George, triumphantly.  
“Oh”, murmurs Elliot, “Man, that’s _awesome_ …”  
“Yeah…”, grins George.  
“You know, if he gives you problems, you just need to give me a call…”, George raises an eyebrow at him, “Or not. You know. Whatever”, murmurs Elliot, pretending to be suddenly very interested in his sandwich.


End file.
